You see, analog sticks are smooth, and for the equally smooth, fair-skinned losers of the world, mostly women. Although in that sense it isn't really an insult. OK, hairy is an insult that works on both sexes. So, analog sticks are hairy, and for the equally hairy, fair-skinned losers of the world, mostly women. Fixed. Kind of.
New Super Mario Brothers is still the only game I have, and I was kinda hoping if I just sat idle that that would magically change. Guess not...so I'll have to take action. Pokemon Pearl is coming out next week. I'm considering more Pearl, as Diamond is see-through and clear, but Pearl is opaque and hard to see through, like a pond of pond scum. Minus the pond. Just pond scum. So no water. You know what I mean?
OK, really, Pearl is- in color terms- 'pink,' and I have a weakness for the color pink. I love it. It's pretty! Except on Princess Peach. She wears pink REALLY badly, unlike Princess Zelda, who made the color. Pre-Princess Zelda, pink didn't exist. They blended a new color for her when they created her. They were gonna call it "Zelda," but they didn't want that one lady with the pink hair calling her band Zelda, so they called it "pink" instead. They carefully avoided even using any letters of Zelda's name, as to avoid confusion. Cleverly, they named the hero Link. A little too close to Pink for comfort, wouldn't you say? Yes sir. Clever, very clever, good sirs!
While browsing, I found a neat site. Or blog. One of those blogs with six different posters who all post eight posts a day or somesuch. It's called DS Fanboy. They're having a top five week, each poster posts their top five DS playable games.
It is a strange thing, but it's people like this that I actually look up to. I have this thing with games, and especially game stores, as everyone there wants to discuss games. I have had a fear of going into game stores for years. Maybe it was that one episode where I called a game store and asked for a game which they didn't have ("Noo, don't have that one, AHHHHHHAHAHHA!"), so I stumbled in there with my Mom and start looking through the games. Innocently. Artist rendition of the Game Crazy employee at right. Note his hands are resting on the counter. Maliciously resting.He asks me, "You looking for anything in particular mwahahahahah?" in his nasally, metallic-sounding, "itchy" voice, like his throat is itching. I respond "yeah, (gamename)" then he responds, really annoyed, like I'm a real jerk, "I told you already, we don't have that game." I think it was such a scarring moment because he was nice at first, then he was mean, and I didn't understand why. I was 16 and a half when this happened.
...really though, I would say I was seven or eight. Great thing to have a scarring memory of, huh? As far as I know, this is the only truly traumatic event I have experienced, and from which I still suffer wide-ranging side effects to this day.
It is a deathly, nervous fear. I called a pizza place a while ago, a month or two, and I was almost in a cold sweat. My adrenaline was going, it took about 10 minutes for me to calm down...and get this. The lady was really nice. So just imagine running into the demon bug again. I wonder if my Mom remembered that episode. With the buglike monster employee. Demon. Puppet. Branchair. What it is.
I guess I have a general fear of talking to people about video games. They're bound to think I'm a freak.
...so anyways, I should go. It's midday, and it's...well...midday. I should clean some dishes and plot dinner. What to make, what to make...no chicken...we have pork which can be cubed, and hamburger. And steaks. Hamburger it is. What kind of hamburger though? Hamburgers are out of the question. We'll see. Good day! I will go have a glass of chocolate milk. Chocolate milk makes me happy, because it's milk, but it doesn't taste entirely like milk.
No comments:
Post a Comment