Last night, as you hopefully know, I found out that my Twilight Princess disc (Wii) no longer works. It looks as if the Wii scratched the disc, but that makes no sense, as it never stopped working, so it was probably Satan trying to ruin my celebration of Christ's birth (which was totally December 25th!), or God trying to teach me something for sure! I hope I can find out if it was God trying to teach me something or Satan doing an attack on me. Gee, I sure wish I could tell.
Or...it's possible that it may have scratched the disc a year ago, and since the Wii's optical sensor was newer, it worked. How should I know? I don't specialize in optical sensors.
I'm going to have to invest not only my own cash into purchasing a new copy, but also some guilt-credits with my parents. I always build up guilt-credits right before Christmas: "Oh, but he's such a good son, let's get him this bar of gold!"
I have been milking the last week or so and I've been such a good son that I'm holding their faces to the figurative guilt wheel. It grinds their faces with guilt, leaving them looking something like Umagon in Tiberian Sun (complete with that suicide trick the Forgotten do).
I even cleaned our bathroom, which is probably not my mom's most looked-forward-to chore on her chore list- see her blog post, Six Days of Freedom.
So I'm covered as far as a new copy of Twilight Princess goes. I'm fine. But my brother? Ooh. His horror is just beginning. He cannot find any tomato sauce, and he's in a depressive slump because of it. Poor joker.
"I've had a ho-horrible, bad day Kev. No talking to me OK?" he says. "OK, brother." I says. Keep in mind that the only thing that happened to him was that he woke up and found out there was no tomato sauce. Enough to ruin his day. OK, brother...sorry about that.
Back to me. My mom called today and asked me if I wanted them to stop (there's the guilt-credits at work!). Well, since they offered, sure...yes, yes...all working into my master plan. Here I come Santa. Yes, we will get him. He will be ours. I'm hoping to get a copy of Twilight Princess used No, no, get it new, for the glory therein; I certainly do not want to spend $50 again. So I called around to 3 Game Crazy's. I've always shopped with them for used games...that is, used games that I need in a hurry. Otherwise I use Half.com.
I called the first one. The guy was cool; very clear voice, and typically they do their speech so fast you can't understand it. Anyways, I asked him, "Hi, what time are you guys open till?" "9 PM." "OK, and do you guys have a copy of Metroid Prime 3: Corruption for the Wii on sale?"
I meant to say "used," but I said "on sale." What a dork. What a dork he was. You are amazing. He said, "It's $50 new, and $37 used with MVP card." "Do you have one used?" "Uhh...let's see...wow, no. It should be pretty easy to find if you look around at the other Game Crazy's." "OK, thanks." "You bet." (click)
I called the second one. He rattled through his speech about how they have the greatest holiday games. "What time are you guys open till?" "10 PM." "OK, and do you have Metroid Prime 3: Corruption for the Wii in stock?" "For the Wii, for the Wii, for the Wii, let's see...yes. Would you like us to hold it for you?" "How much is it?" "It's...$50." "Oh, no, I wouldn't like it held." (click)
He seemed like he wanted me to go to Hell.
I called the third one. "Hi, what time are you guys open till?" "10 PM." "OK, good. Do you guys have a copy of Metroid Prime 3: Corruption used?" "Let's see...nope. It's new for $50." "OK, thanks." (awkward pause) (click)
I was about to call the 4th Game Crazy, when I lost my nerve. I found it again whilst I was considering that if it's new, it may come without packaging, but that's good, because I already have a Twilight Princess package box kit...
If you have not realized by now, dear reader, might I suggest you take some advice I could have used, and get some coffee...as I have been calling around for a copy of Metroid Prime 3. Metroid Prime 3 works fine. I need a copy of The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, not Metroid Prime 3!
Oh, where did I go wrong. You did not. Where did I folly? You did not. What caused me to err? You have not. Tiredness? You are never tired. You never sleep. Stupidity? Idiocy? Dimwittedness? What could it have possibly been, this force that made me make an idiotic display out of myself, and even still pushes me to blog about my embarrassment? It's so natural to say Metroid Prime 3: Corruption, I suppose.
Now I have to call them all back. I will wait an hour, and by then...hopefully they'll have forgotten. Ooh, embarrassment of embarrassments. And you know how much trouble I have with calling places! (Nintendo DS (Lite) Update -- the NDS will be getting some attention here shortly.) But now I know how late they are open, so I can just ask if they have TP on sale. They'll make no connection!
I'm sure more of them have TP used. It's a year old...MP3 is not. Ugh. Idiot!
I guess I can call the final Game Crazy I was going to call out of desperation; hopefully word has not yet gotten around to the other Game Crazy's of my stupidity. It's about 5 miles out of my parent's way.
Oh, drat. Their phone is not working. I'll call the first Game Crazy I called. Oohgh. Embarrassment. On hold...on hold...his computer isn't working right...they don't have one, but it would be $41 used. Weird.
My mom suggests that instead of feeling the awesome, glowing shame of calling the other two back, we should just get it new. They decided to stop by a game store to avoid going to Walmart. It was...a Gamestop. She called me to make sure I wanted a used one, and by the time I had called her back, it turned out that she had already bought the game new, despite the fact that they had the chance to buy it used (to their credit, it was only $8 more new, and they were trying to do good.)
So now I'm back on schedule...and seeing's how they stopped by Frys just for my brother, he'll be back on schedule by tomorrow as well.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to clean my room, then I'm going to play Twilight Princess. And attempt to kill Santa. If he is real. Which he isn't. Here, come get the cookies, Saint Nick...
Fresh goats milk...
...and gunpowder...
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